The Proposal

I kept mum about some things that quite affected me lately as manifested by the long slumber of this blog. I only got to share the emotional turmoil I mentioned in a previous entry to a very few people since it is something not worth sharing about. I've been thinking about posting this entry a million times already but it feels like I can't move on if I don't post this. Seriously, it's time wasting. So get ready for an episode of nausea. 

I do not understand why some Meranao parents get in a state of rush about getting their daughters "settled" right after earning a degree for themselves. Among the unfortunate ones, they're forced to tie the knot when they're few meters away from their educational success. For some, they're wedded right after passing their board exams. It's like a curse that when you finish schooling or when you have achieved something for yourself then you're already "open for bidding". You've suddenly ascended to that level where relatives talks about you and before you know it you've been matched to the "most eligible son" of this and that aunt/uncle or however you may call them. Probably because back in the day, only few women among the Meranaos were lucky enough to have an education hence it has become a tradition among us, Meranaos, that females MUST get married after earning a degree to prevent deviating from the norms.

There's also that fear of "spinstership" among parents. Any person who acquired an adequate knowledge learns to think sharply of the situation, weigh things and know his/her value as a person. Hence, the emergence of what they call "choosy" or "picky" women. This picky-ness has been the culprit of many "successful women" who chose to stay single for the rest of their lives. (And my mother has many examples to cite. Damn.) Now to prevent their daughters from the misery of spinstership, they arrange a marriage for them to the most "likeable" guy they could imagine for their (ironically, would-be miserable) daughter. Others follow the tradition in the name of "love and respect for parents", while for some, they try to defy and follow what is dictated by their hearts. 

Marriage is not something that one grabs when opportunity presents it only because you fear ending up as a single lady. Remember, it is a lifelong commitment. It is not like a mere boy-girl relationship that you can easily break when you fell out of love. Marriage is something that you can have your entire soul ready, something that down to your very last cell agrees. It must have a foundation of friendship and love, and it must bring acceptance, joy and happiness and not otherwise. I guess you know it when the right time comes, apparently, they just knew it. 

My mom insisted it is the right time as I turned 25. Marriage is not about age. Never. Being in the medical field, of course I ponder about the declining of the fecundity rate as a woman turns 30 and beyond, but hey, come on, I am only in my sizzling twenty fifth year! There's more fruitful five years yet to come before I start worrying about my reproductive health (and of my lovelife thereof). Marriage is something that is gazillion light years away from my mind. When I get to that point of wanting a lifetime partner for myself, I want to do it for the right reason at the right time with the right person. InshaAllah. :)

Come on people, there's more to life than getting married!!

Case closed, InshaAllah. :)

Cheers for the new year 2011!! Let's start chasing the marrow of this so-called LIFE! Heeeyaahh!!