February 28, 2012

BURN For Me Baby.


This is where we literally skin people alive. Does that made you cringe? I do, too, upon seeing and hearing them scream as we peel of necrotic tissues from their burnt skin while begging us to do it slowly and gently. Indeed, we do it as slowly and as gently as we can but it is really painful. Ideally, burn patients should be sedated during debridement, but what can we do? It is literally painful to be poor. :'( 

February 25, 2012


Rumors about my crush couldn't be true or my world will begin to crumble. Therefore, I must face this with a bias-free and an open mind. An investigation must commence. 

Seriously? Haha. 

PedSx


My surgical subspecialty of choice. Too bad I only have one week to bask in the subjects of Intussusception, Hirschprung's disease, Imperforate Anus and other pediatric surgical cases. It's frustrating though that subspecialty rotating interns do not assist in their ORs. :'( I wanna see how PSARP (posterior sagittal anorectal plasty) procedure  and pediatric intestinal anastomosis are being done. :'(
I don't have plans of pursuing surgery but this sparks some curiosity in me. 


The only pediatric surgical OR I assisted was herniotomy at the Major OPD OR which was done in like 30 minutes, my gloves weren't even stained!! 

By the way, we have a rotating German intern  from a certain university in Germany. I don't talk to him much like I would do to someone I can easy-breezily have a conversation with mostly because I have difficulty understanding his accent!! Lol! German-English accent!! Nakaka-nosebleed!! So I would usually allow him to do his thing while I do mine and ask him once in a while how he's doing. Awkward? Hahaha!


We had a laparoscopy workshop along with PedSx residents and consultants. It was fun manipulating beads and rubber bands by using the graspers just like in an actual laparoscopy although it takes huge amount of patience and good hand-eye coordination!!! If I would become a surgeon, I would most probably opt for an open laparotomy than laparoscopy!! Haha!! 

On another news,  I found the perfect place for studying!!! Taaadaa!!!

It's a walking distance coffeeshop near our place where everybody goes not to chat but to read! Awesome! So you get to read books with pure serenity, plus the high-ceiling structure of the place allows enough light for ventilation. :) This place is a huge help for me to avoid many temptations at home: TV, internet, bed, and fridge. :) 


Also, our photo with a cardiac pacemaker recipient patient was published in Heart and Health Magazine. This was taken during my MICU (medical ICU) rotation, and together with the resident-in-charge, Ma'am Gelay, we posed for this photo which was sent to Heartbeat International Foundation and Pusong Pinoy Foundation for the purpose of seeking funds for this lucky patient. 
Credit goes to my blockmate Alaric Salonga for taking this one. If you look closely, he manually wrote his name underneath the photo while bantering why his name wasn't on it. Lol! 

*All photos were taken using my iPod. Such poor qualities, my point-and-shoot Canon should have been used for that DSLR-like shots I'm so proud of. Haha. 


"While we are robust and in the prime of life, we imagine our deathbeds, the wisdom we mean to impart, and the precious words, like jewels on a necklace, that we intend to bequeath to those around us. 
But it is rarely to be.
We perish quickly on the battlefield, or in an accident, or in a lingering illness that will not announce its schedule for our destruction. 
And so our words perish with us, and those left behind are condemned to clutch at memories, at what they imagine we wished to say."

-Margaret George's Helen of Troy. 



February 20, 2012

A Hearty Prayer

I swear I do not know how to start the forewords for this entry because I feel so shy about actually putting this into writing. Fine. So, I wrote a letter to God. These are the words that were sitting silently in my head but were uttered with difficulty by the tongue. Since He is Omnipotent, the All-Seer, the All-Hearing, I know He recognizes my unsaid prayers. This was inspired by the people who painted the town red during Valentines Day. Thanks to them, I got reminded how lurve has been elusive to someone like me. I hate musing about the state of my hearty flakes. I am so contented with this extended adolescence and having plain crushes, but I keep a secret prayer which is to be divulged now. Oh well. Here goes. 

Dear God,

I pray that You guide my heart to the right person, the one who will be courageous enough to wall off this coldness that envelopes me, the one who will help me strengthen my faith in You, the one who will fill the puzzle of my being, the one with whom I will share my happiness and all the success I will have to acquire while we wander in Your beautiful earth. 

Please guide me to the person who will cherish, love, honor and respect my parents and my siblings as much or even more than what he shows me. The one who will value and love me unconditionally. Inshaa Allah, we will bring out the best in each other.  Ya Allah, please guide my heart to the person who will never do anything that will break my heart and that of my parents'. 

Ya Allah, please spare me from loving someone who will only bring misery to me and my family. I pray that whoever You choose to be my future better-half would be someone that my parents and I also desire. If this person will only bring me misery then please take back all my feelings. I'd rather live with a stale heart than cause havoc in my most prized possession---my family. 

However, if this person will prove that he is worth his salt then allow our fate to meet at the soonest appointed time. I know You've been designing all of these in perfect manner for the past 26 years of my life, Inshaa Allah this person will emerge in the perfect moment perhaps near to what I have imagined. Only You can fashion a love so excellently that can be hindered by no one. Hence, I leave it all up to Your care. 

Please guide our hearts as all of these shall become futile without Your Holy Guidance. 
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Most Beneficent. 
Ameen. 




You, what's your prayer? :)

February 14, 2012


Cefazolin 2g loading dose now then 1g Q8.

PGH Intern does:
IV insertion
blood extraction
drug administration
vital signs monitoring
paperworks: clinical abstracts, discharge summaries
first in line at the ER
triaging
pushing stretchers and wheelchairs
chest compressions and ambubagging if patient has no bantay

Anything amiss?

Remorseful? NOT.
I say, grateful. :)






February 12, 2012

TRAUMAtized.

"Oi Aisha, sobrang sorry kanina ah. Zero sleep kase ako kagabi tas nag-assist ako til umaga kaya pagdating ko jan knocked out ako. Tapos andami dami tumatawag na nanonoxic na wala ko kaalam-alam sa mga sinasabi nila kaya natoxic kita dun sa charts. Sorry talaga ah."


That apologetic text message came from my resident after an incident at the ER when he sort of raised his voice at me when I delayed gathering the patients' charts for him. After the morning rounds with the Trauma* team captain, she instructed me to give all the charts to the nurses so they can immediately carry out some of the orders and I did what I was just told. By and by, this resident arrived at the ER slumped on the table to steal some naps after, I guess, weeks of being on straight duty!! Once in a while, he would raise his head to ask if we have referrals but it was obvious that he was half-asleep half-awake. He spoke as if he's sleep-talking. Hehe. I heard his phone ringing several times but he was still in deep sleep. I hesitated disturbing him as I fully understood how it feels to be sleepless. Later on, I guess when he was fully awake, he sprung his head from the table and was reading his text messages. He then asked me to gather the charts. I bet the senior residents were asking him stuff about the current status of our patients and since he wasn't present during the morning rounds, he's not updated about anything. That's probably why he wants to see the charts. Problem was, the nurses were in the middle of carrying out the orders and they wouldn't give the charts to me. If I steal those charts, the carrying out of doctor's orders will be put off and if that happens, I will answer to the team captain. I thought the resident can wait, I even showed him our logbook where we wrote  patients' updates but he insisted on me collecting all our charts. I told him the nurses won't give the charts and that's when he got mad and raised his voice, but not to the point of shouting. I didn't answer back as it is not my habit to answer back to people older or senior than I am. I kind of giving in to their whims with all due respect to the position they hold over me. So without any words, I returned to the nurses' station and started begging for the charts. I saw him stormed out of the room, he was probably called at the ward. I was disgusted by him that morning I didn't wanna see him again.

At around afternoon, my co-intern Sherwin and I were conducting patients to Radiology when that resident called him up asking for my number. I told Sherwin not to provide my number as I assumed he would just give me series of orders nanaman. Do this and do that. Plus, I'm loathing him pa, I told Sherwin. A few while later, I kept wondering ano nanaman iuutos niya so I decided to just phone him. He said he'd just text me. Gah, mahaba-habang utos nanaman siguro 'to, I thought to myself. That's when I was surprised by that text message. I am humbled by the humility he has shown. Very few residents would have done that. They'd just assume we understand what they're going through and would never bother to apologize. That's one of the things I like here in PGH, residents do not terrorize interns as much as in other hospitals do. At least, we are not being treated as slaves to them like the stories on asking interns to buy them food, or groceries or withdraw money for them. You know, stuff which are no longer hospital-related. Those don't happen here in PGH. You will get terrorized if you cannot explain what happened to your patient. Nothing of those monkey businesses. 

All Trauma first year residents (3 of them) had been on what seems like a perpetual duty. They don't have the leisure time to go home to even change their clothes. They were either at the ER, at the ward or at the OR assisting at operations. They are the first people to be called regarding patients' status. These three residents help and cover for each other, so nobody among them goes home. That would explain their mood. Seeing them in that state discourages me to go into residency in a government-owned hospital. I'm not sure if I can devote that much time, or rather, if I can devote my whole self in the spirit of training when I can have the same learning if I go into a private tertiary hospital. I do not know yet. I haven't made up my mind yet where to go for residency for I am yet to take the boards!! Hahaha!! 

If you wonder what I replied to that message, I said. "No probs, Sir" and a smiley. He again said sorry. My crazy co-intern Issa suggested I should have replied just a plain and simple "K"!!!!!!! I wonder how the resident would react to that!! Seriously, apology accepted. I admired the humility. It's either humble lang talaga siya or ayaw lang niya masunog at the end of the year!! Either way, apology accepted pa rin. :)

*After everything I said about Trauma, yes, I ate my words and now I am a Trauma intern! Grrr! I had to shift over to Trauma because they lack one person in the group so I volunteered after realizing it might be of help in my future practice as doctor to the barrio. The way I feel for Trauma is just the same. 

February 4, 2012

Of Lights

Lights and I have this unspoken, secret relationship that we only recognize once we are bounded. It's comparable to an old friend you haven't seen for eons and when you bump into each other, you felt that certain amount of nostalgia flaming inside of you. It pokes your heart and spontaneously opens that well-guarded vulnerability in you. It brings this seemingly secret message that can only be fathomed mutually. It makes your jaw drop in utter amazement. It makes your mind wander to the vast infinity of possibilities. It resurrects hopes, dreams and infinite love.  
Under the lights, you decide to drop your guards. :) 


Lantern Festival in Taiwan.*


I'm no Christian but I love Christmas because of the lights.*


I always look forward to every New Year hugely because of fireworks display.*


I would always looooove the night sky because of the glittery stars decorating its pitch-darkness. *



Something I look forward to see for myself in this lifetime, the lights at The Eiffel.* :)

*Googled photos.


February 3, 2012


Mark Onglao, August 2011 Physician Licensure Exam Board Topnotcher, and currently a 1st year Surgery resident, sat right next to me last Wednesday during the department mortality and morbidity (M&M) conference. I wished I possess some sort of mental imbibing powers so I could have grabbed the opportunity! Hahaha! 


At the OPD Major OR, this patient was supposedly for hemorrhoidectomy. But because he weighed 122.6 kilograms, the anesthesiologist had difficulty doing the spinal anesthesia so he resorted to general anesthesia. However, when the surgeon assessed the surgical field, he knew he would have difficulty doing the operation with that weight so he deferred. After the intubation and all, the patient was brought home. Haha! Morale: LOSE WEIGHT!! 


Surgery resident waiting for the anesthesiologist. Postduty Ma'am? :)


Now, here's something smurfed to scare those tiny mosquitoes away! 
...buzzz.....

Update: we're shifting out from GS2.
Have a blessed Friday! :)