Protons

              When everything seems perfect in my life, I plummeted into the darkest pit called Negativity. I became spiteful, irritable and reproachful. I became a monster I never figured out I would be in my dire attempt to keep everything around me in order. I had a constant feeling of disappointment, frustrations and hopelessness. I was full of doubts and mistrust. It certainly had a tremendous effect on my relationship with my loved ones. They are the ones who suffered for my twisted negative thinking. Until I came across a book called The Secret. It holds the greatest secret of all prominent men in history---POSITIVITY. It talks about the power of positive thinking and how you can convert your negative thoughts into positive ones. Life is very simple, we should always keep in mind that "what we give, we receive". Human beings are likened to transmission towers of powerful energy manifested by our thoughts and feelings. 

(Googled photo)

                Like a powerful transmission tower, what we give out into the Universe through our thoughts and feelings about the different aspects of our lives -- relationships, health, dreams, and finances--- will bounce back to us in equal or even more intensified. If we practice positivity in our daily lives, we will exercise patience, compassion and gratitude. We will have an open heart and mind, we feel like our life works harmoniously with the Universe. Everything flows smoothly, even if we are faced with difficult obstacles, we can easily get off the hook and proceed spontaneously as we wish it to be. The main ingredient of this book, the superstar of them all is gratitude. Sometimes, when we wake up on the wrong side of the bed in the morning, the rest of our day is ruined. That is because we didn't find around us anything to be grateful for, we were not being grateful for the life given to us by Him.

                   I know this would be no easy feat but I am trying to live the proton life every single day. The most amazing thing about it is that I have understood the very essence why we, Muslims, are required to pray five times a day. We do not pray to merely ask but we pray in order to be grateful, to speak the two powerful words "Thank You", at least five times a day to nonetheless but the Creator. We thank Him for every single minute miracles in our lives, from the air we breathe, our circulating blood, our family and friends and every single source of happiness and joy in this world. 

                    I encourage you to look around you and find something to be grateful for. Also, when you pray, do not ask for anything without expressing your gratitude first. Feel it and you will receive, in shaa Allah. Join me in sprinkling protons in this world! Let's start by sharing a HUGE smile to the people we meet and everyone around us. Smile, it's sadaqah (charity). :)

Boylet.

we kinda drifted apart. but we have always known deep inside that we're perfectly stitched by nature for each other. we both became busy with our respective careers *cough*, yet we still keep on holding on. 

he's a serious guy, you see. 

and shy, too. that's why he doesn't want to publicize our relationship.

this was the time he tried to discreetly leave an event to meet up with me. however, paparazzi always follow him around. oh well, he's paying for his fame. tsk, tsk. poor boyfriend, nobody tries to spare him some privacy. 

   anyhow, he still keeps that balance. between his career.....and our secret relationship. 

oh, pretty boy. don't worry. there's no obstacle we can't hurdle. all of this shall pass. 

end of daydreaming. *swoon*

Norwegian Wood

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Books
Genre:	Romance
Author:	Haruki Murakami

Excerpt:
I telephoned Midori. "I have to talk to you," I said. "I have a million things to talk to you about. A million things we have to talk about. All I want in this world is you. I want to see you and talk. I want the two of us to begin everything from the beginning."
Midori responded with a long, long silence----the silence of all the misty rain in the world falling on all the new-mown lawns of the world. Forehead pressed against the glass, I shut my eyes and waited. At last, Midori's quiet voice broke the silence: "Where are you now?"
Where was I now?
Gripping the receiver, I raised my head and turned to see what lay beyond the telephone booth. Where was I now? I had no idea. .... Again and again, I called out for Midori from the dead center of this place that was no place.

***********

This is definitely an addition to my bests-list. This has opened my mind to the nature of equally loving two different persons of opposite characters, on how need can be misconstrued as love and how a beautiful friendship is transformed into love. I'm so overwhelmed by the story and the characters. Ito ang totoong "It's Complicated". :)

Jason Magbanua | Wedding Videographer » Blog Archive » Angela and Aaron: A Teaser

http://jasonmagbanua.com/blog/2010/03/07/angela-and-aarons-a-teaser/
I don't attend weddings other than my closest relatives' and friends' but I'm quite a sucker for pre-nup videos and perfect weddings. I can only wish there'd be something like this when my moment comes. Weee! :)

Check out his other wedding videos. <3 data-blogger-escaped-air="air" data-blogger-escaped-div="div" data-blogger-escaped-humid="humid" data-blogger-escaped-is="is" data-blogger-escaped-looovvvveee...="looovvvveee..." data-blogger-escaped-so="so" data-blogger-escaped-the="the" data-blogger-escaped-with="with">

On seeing the 100% perfect girl one beautiful April morning

I thought this is an amazing story worth sharing from one of my favorite authors. Tell me what you think.. Enjoy!

On seeing the 100% perfect girl one beautiful April morning

Haruki Murakami

One beautiful April morning, on a narrow side street in Tokyo's fashionable Harujuku neighborhood, I walked past the 100% perfect girl.

Tell you the truth, she's not that good-looking. She doesn't stand out in any way. Her clothes are nothing special. The back of her hair is still bent out of shape from sleep. She isn't young, either - must be near thirty, not even close to a "girl," properly speaking. But still, I know from fifty yards away: She's the 100% perfect girl for me. The moment I see her, there's a rumbling in my chest, and my mouth is as dry as a desert.

Maybe you have your own particular favorite type of girl - one with slim ankles, say, or big eyes, or graceful fingers, or you're drawn for no good reason to girls who take their time with every meal. I have my own preferences, of course. Sometimes in a restaurant I'll catch myself staring at the girl at the next table to mine because I like the shape of her nose.

But no one can insist that his 100% perfect girl correspond to some preconceived type. Much as I like noses, I can't recall the shape of hers - or even if she had one. All I can remember for sure is that she was no great beauty. It's weird.

"Yesterday on the street I passed the 100% girl," I tell someone.

"Yeah?" he says. "Good-looking?"

"Not really."

"Your favorite type, then?"

"I don't know. I can't seem to remember anything about her - the shape of her eyes or the size of her breasts."

"Strange."

"Yeah. Strange."

"So anyhow," he says, already bored, "what did you do? Talk to her? Follow her?"

"Nah. Just passed her on the street."

She's walking east to west, and I west to east. It's a really nice April morning.

Wish I could talk to her. Half an hour would be plenty: just ask her about herself, tell her about myself, and - what I'd really like to do - explain to her the complexities of fate that have led to our passing each other on a side street in Harajuku on a beautiful April morning in 1981. This was something sure to be crammed full of warm secrets, like an antique clock build when peace filled the world.

After talking, we'd have lunch somewhere, maybe see a Woody Allen movie, stop by a hotel bar for cocktails. With any kind of luck, we might end up in bed.

Potentiality knocks on the door of my heart.

Now the distance between us has narrowed to fifteen yards.

How can I approach her? What should I say?

"Good morning, miss. Do you think you could spare half an hour for a little conversation?"

Ridiculous. I'd sound like an insurance salesman.

"Pardon me, but would you happen to know if there is an all-night cleaners in the neighborhood?"
No, this is just as ridiculous. I'm not carrying any laundry, for one thing. Who's going to buy a line like that?

Maybe the simple truth would do. "Good morning. You are the 100% perfect girl for me."

No, she wouldn't believe it. Or even if she did, she might not want to talk to me. Sorry, she could say, I might be the 100% perfect girl for you, but you're not the 100% boy for me. It could happen. And if I found myself in that situation, I'd probably go to pieces. I'd never recover from the shock. I'm thirty-two, and that's what growing older is all about.

We pass in front of a flower shop. A small, warm air mass touches my skin. The asphalt is damp, and I catch the scent of roses. I can't bring myself to speak to her. She wears a white sweater, and in her right hand she holds a crisp white envelope lacking only a stamp. So: She's written somebody a letter, maybe spent the whole night writing, to judge from the sleepy look in her eyes. The envelope could contain every secret she's ever had.

I take a few more strides and turn: She's lost in the crowd.

Now, of course, I know exactly what I should have said to her. It would have been a long speech, though, far too long for me to have delivered it properly. The ideas I come up with are never very practical.

Oh, well. It would have started "Once upon a time" and ended "A sad story, don't you think?"
Once upon a time, there lived a boy and a girl. The boy was eighteen and the girl sixteen. He was not unusually handsome, and she was not especially beautiful. They were just an ordinary lonely boy and an ordinary lonely girl, like all the others. But they believed with their whole hearts that somewhere in the world there lived the 100% perfect boy and the 100% perfect girl for them. Yes, they believed in a miracle. And that miracle actually happened.

One day the two came upon each other on the corner of a street.

"This is amazing," he said. "I've been looking for you all my life. You may not believe this, but you're the 100% perfect girl for me."

"And you," she said to him, "are the 100% perfect boy for me, exactly as I'd pictured you in every detail. It's like a dream."

They sat on a park bench, held hands, and told each other their stories hour after hour. They were not lonely anymore. They had found and been found by their 100% perfect other. What a wonderful thing it is to find and be found by your 100% perfect other. It's a miracle, a cosmic miracle.

As they sat and talked, however, a tiny, tiny sliver of doubt took root in their hearts: Was it really all right for one's dreams to come true so easily?

And so, when there came a momentary lull in their conversation, the boy said to the girl, "Let's test ourselves - just once. If we really are each other's 100% perfect lovers, then sometime, somewhere, we will meet again without fail. And when that happens, and we know that we are the 100% perfect ones, we'll marry then and there. What do you think?"

"Yes," she said, "that is exactly what we should do."

And so they parted, she to the east, and he to the west.

The test they had agreed upon, however, was utterly unnecessary. They should never have undertaken it, because they really and truly were each other's 100% perfect lovers, and it was a miracle that they had ever met. But it was impossible for them to know this, young as they were. The cold, indifferent waves of fate proceeded to toss them unmercifully.

One winter, both the boy and the girl came down with the season's terrible influenza, and after drifting for weeks between life and death they lost all memory of their earlier years. When they awoke, their heads were as empty as the young D. H. Lawrence's piggy bank.

They were two bright, determined young people, however, and through their unremitting efforts they were able to acquire once again the knowledge and feeling that qualified them to return as full-fledged members of society. Heaven be praised, they became truly upstanding citizens who knew how to transfer from one subway line to another, who were fully capable of sending a special-delivery letter at the post office. Indeed, they even experienced love again, sometimes as much as 75% or even 85% love.

Time passed with shocking swiftness, and soon the boy was thirty-two, the girl thirty.

One beautiful April morning, in search of a cup of coffee to start the day, the boy was walking from west to east, while the girl, intending to send a special-delivery letter, was walking from east to west, but along the same narrow street in the Harajuku neighborhood of Tokyo. They passed each other in the very center of the street. The faintest gleam of their lost memories glimmered for the briefest moment in their hearts. Each felt a rumbling in their chest. And they knew:

She is the 100% perfect girl for me.

He is the 100% perfect boy for me.

But the glow of their memories was far too weak, and their thoughts no longer had the clarity of fourteen years earlier. Without a word, they passed each other, disappearing into the crowd. Forever.

A sad story, don't you think?

Yes, that's it, that is what I should have said to her.

Heart Talk

Since it's the month of hearts, let's talk about this great force of nature called physical attraction. Classmate T and I have been discussing about this line that crosses between Crush and Love, whether it is a thin or a thick one. For me, there's a thick line that divides Crush and Love. In fact, there's the Like that goes in between. To make matters (worse) more complicated, we made three Classifications of Crush: Low Crush, Moderate Crush and Severe Crush. He gave me the task to assign criteria for every class, after which, we'd pass it to the World Crush Organization for validity. If there is such. Harhar!!

1. Let's start with the lowermost level called Crush. This is the first thing we learned about physical attraction, some discovered this feeling in high school, others in grade school while for early bloomers, they've got crushes since nursery days. This is purely based on the physical aspect of the person. He could be an actor, a classmate, a schoolmate, a sibling's friend, a friend's sibling, a neighbor, or a random person you constantly bump into the hallway or at the canteen. He's your crush because he's got tantalizing eyes, a prominent nose or a perfect set of teeth. As I have mentioned, there are three classifications of this kind of feeling:

a. Low Crush: This is the most benign form. You find him attractive but there's no kilig factor at all. He's there, you're here, you coexist but there's nothing more than that. You don't exert an effort to get noticed. You don't care if he has a girlfriend or none.

                 Sign: You tend to stare whenever he's not looking. Just like that.

b. Moderate Crush: Five notches above Low Crush, there's the presence of that kilig factor and you make an effort to get noticed. You create some silly excuses to talk to him.

                 Signs: Whenever he says "hi" and asks how you're doing, the two corners of lips are stretched all the way to your nape. You tend to stutter and mumble the wrong words.

c. Severe Crush: Aside from the kilig factor, you try to get to know him more than the basic infos. He's the person you tell your friends you have a crush on and forbid them to have the same feelings because "you found him first", so with all due respect to you, they're not supposed to get kilig in your presence. You start to snoop into his FB account, or worse, stalk him!!

                 Signs: Cold and clammy extremities and whenever he's around, your heart starts to flutter.

Crushes are crushes, you don't hope for anything more than that. Nothing serious especially among Low and Moderate Crushes. As for Severe Crush, there's a tenfold probability that it may progress to the next level which is.....

2. Like. When you "like" a person, there's already that connection. Good looks is not a necessity, in fact, the Crush phase may not be a prerequisite. You may like him because of some aspects of his personality more than the looks. This will eventually come into a crossroad when the spark either intensifies or fades. One proceeds to the road toward the third level which is the most complicated one, the overused and abused thing called Love; while the other road opens to the stable and lasting relationship called Friendship. And I mean the Friendship that does not go beyond the barrier. At this road, both of you might find another romantic spark from other people.

3. Love. Alright, it took me a long while staring into the space before I start collecting my thoughts on this. I am no authority but allow me to give it a shot. I may be talking fallacies, but before any violent reactions...just...shut up, okay? Hehe! So love, the most abused word on this planet. We say "I Love You" to almost everybody, but what is really love? (By the way, when I say "I Love You" to my girlfriends, I really mean that. Er, we're not talking about that kind of love anyway.) Perhaps it is the acceptance of the person as a whole---including his positives as well as his negatives. The dopamine rush that goes with Crush and Like (which apparently lasts no longer than 2 years) might have already evaporated, however you stick to the person. You accept every inch of him while pondering on his undesirable characteristics you can live with. By that, you do not try to change him for if there is love, you'll accept him for whatever he is or he'll change wholeheartedly for you. As for a fairytale believer that I am, Love is meant to last forever.

Advance Happy Hearts, People! Keep Believing in Love and Let's Paint the Town RED.

Follow Your Heart

While we were conducting a class review this afternoon for the supposed retake, as usual we were arguing over clashing statements by two different books. Very confusing for us which to take side: Jaen or Robbins? Since we couldn't settle it out, the group consensus is to follow our hearts. And then JE said: Mura po'g bright atong hearts. Everybody were silent for a while as some were seemed hit by that even though she doesn't mean anything. We all burst into laughters as we realized that some can actually relate into it. Oooppsie...

******

*dug this from my phone inbox.

I LOVE YOU

A warning.

An apology.

An interruption.

A plea for attention.

An objection.

An excuse.

A justification.

A reminder.

A trap.

A blessing.

A disguise.

A vacuum.

A revelation.

A way of saying nothing.

A way of summarizing everything.

A surrender.

An opening.

An end.

***

Falling in-love makes one vulnerable and vulnerability leads to hurting. Who likes to get hurt? Definitely not me.

Hence....

***
It's DECEMBER already!! The last month for the Year 2009, let's have a blast people!
Today I'm saying hello to ONCOLOGY. *dies*
First-day-of-the-month realization: WHY SETTLE FOR DEPRESSION WHEN THERE IS MORE TO LIFE?! Cheerios!

Of Letting Go

After more than eight years of holding on to a person, you resolved to let go. You felt liberated. Free of uncertain hopes, of unfathomable emotions, and of incurable depressions. It is not cowardice, rather, mustering all your vigor to relinquish what is not meant to be. It is like surrendering to a Math problem that has no solution after it has bled your brain.
It is not giving up for you do not give up on true love. You still believe that it will come at the right time with the right person at the right place.
Rather, it is ACCEPTANCE OF FREEDOM!
It's like being in a deep slumber wherein you dreamt of a person whose persona you created with handful of your expectations and presumptions. You enveloped yourself with images of him alone. You pushed away other people to love him alone. Just him. Alone.
And then you wake up. Only to find out that everything has been a trance.
And then you let go. It's like gently pulling a knife that was stuck at your ribs.
You can breathe again. Your blood has circulated again and you are full of life again!

"....I will always remember now that love is liberty. That was the lesson it took me several years to learn. That is the lesson that sent me into an exile and now that sets me free again." ~~~Paulo Coelho (Brida)

masha-Allah..

"you don't need to go out and see the nature to appreciate God's creation. within our body-- our very own physiology--helps us understand God's magical wonder of creation." ~~Dra. Leah Manapat

i say, there's no need to read physiological books to appreciate God's creation. take Lee Min Ho for example...

"oppa, i'm single too.."

God, how can he be so perfect? MashaAllah..

Ken Zhu's second album

*this was released early this year. i'm still looking for a store that actually sells his CD. wala 'ata sa Mindanao eh. badtrip.


***drool*** so adorable***

Ken Zhu (my love) sings "Here We Are" in Manila

This was during the unforgettable visit of Ken Zhu, member of F4, in Manila sometime in 2004. He's the first Asian actor/singer I love (as in real LOVE..hehe) which started during the Meteor Garden mania. Nagpaka-jologs ako nang dahil sa kanya..haha! I used to buy stickers of him, life-size posters, etcetera. Lahat ng ka-jologsan ng isang fanatic. I studied the Chinese culture, Buddhism, Singapore (self-reading lang); I sung Mandarin songs (F4's and Ken's songs) by heart. Feel na feel ko ang moment. Because of him, I ultimately dream of going to Singapore (he grew up there). wahaha! Kaya mahal ko ang Asya at ang kultura nito. I also remember, I had my ear pierced (upper lobe edge) coz he has lots of body pierces (a total of seven). Until now, I still can't get enough of him. I am a proud MRS. ZHU! Haha!

Good Frog Hunting

Rating:	★★★
Category:	Books
Genre:	Entertainment
Author:	Laurie Graff

FINALLY, I finished reading Laurie Graff’s Good Frog Hunting (Looking for Mr. Goodfrog in other editions) after months of marveling of when I’ll be able to finish the book. I bought it last summer when I was desperate, no not desperate, “looking” for tips about lurve is more fitting term. It is one hilarious book as the main character, Karrie Kline, wanders into seeking Mr. Goodfrog described as a single male; rather than seeking Mr. Right who’s not only single but also intelligent, attractive, funny, successful, non-commitment phobic male. Her encounter with various men, in which she always ends up as one humongous loser, made me lose track of their names. She met a lot of frogs in the pond and hoped for that thing that’d last eternally, but nil came up that’s real. Nevertheless, she never made that portion of her life stop her from what she really loves—acting. Instead, she created a one-woman show based on her lovelife branded Frogaphobia. Then, nung successful na siya saka pa nagsidatingan ang mga walang kwentang frogs. Puchax talaga.

Why she’s searching for a boyfriend:
“…knowing the travel time would be spent praying you wouldn’t feel awkward standing alone with no one to talk to during all the awkward moments you’d be standing alone with no one to talk to because that’s what happened when you went to one of those things dateless and alone.”

Yet again,
“Was commitment fate, or just a decision one chose to make at a certain? Did love propel
commitment, or was it the other way around? And if that was the case, what’s love got to do with it?”

Ano ba kasi talaga?

Last Night at TEDT'S

Open na ang McDo dito sa Iligan! Yay! But the mall, per se, is not yet open. It will take million years pa siguro bago ma-entirely furnish at magkaro’n ng laman. Hay. Finally, may existing mall na dito sa Iligan (“pero Gaisano parin” ‘ika nga ni Lily). Dahil hindi mahulugan ng karayom ang McDo, Ate Ayin (my housemate) and I ended up at Tedt’s, just some few steps from the mall. I love their Chicken Pasta Supreme and Kubori Biko. Speaking of biko (a local dessert made up of sticky rice topped with sugar or coconut milk latik), we were at the library the other day talking about what snack is available at the canteen when I suggested biko to Jho, she referred to it as “eeewww..biko, I don’t eat that!”. It was a joke, of course! One who doesn’t eat biko mustn’t claim him/herself as Pinoy or Meranao! We kept on laughing when I called her: mamanti and sumasayan. (Meranao slang, I don’t know how to translate them neither in Tagalog nor English..hehehe).

Anyway, I’m not gonna talk about biko though masarap talaga ang Kubori biko nila sa Tedt’s. But my conversation with Miss Ayin at Tedt’s. We were in the midst of conversation about our lovelives or rather about her palalabs (kasi wala nga naman akong lovelife na ikukuwento) when she told me na mataas daw ang standard ko. Gosh! Coming from someone na madalas din mabansagan na mataas ang standard!  She sensed it! I didn’t take it as a compliment. My “lofty” standard doesn’t make me proud nor does it make me happy. I consider it as a defect that causes my impaired lovelife.

Maybe I’m becoming too idealistic, too choosy, well, I’ve never been into a relationship so I don’t have hints, only what I see in my friends’ relationships and on TV and on movies. Consequently, other people’s mistakes in their relationship are learned lessons for me. And, I thought, since I’ve been a real good girl all my life, I think I only deserve the best. Hihi.

 How-everrrr, my mind doesn't close to the existence of the word “reality”. And he’s my reality. Too far from my “almost” perfect guy, but I want him still. Yet, lopsidedness tramples me in the dust.

L.J.J.

I am about to share a guy that occupies most part of my thought and of my dreams at almost all times these days. I never knew him personally, in fact I only met him once. He never kinda got my attention at first because I was too drawn to the other guy, I even loathed him before.  He is a lawyer, tall (around six feet), chinky-eyed and he has a well-formed body that will make women drool. He has an aggressive personality that he will do whatever it takes to get what he wants and he will fight for it. Two months ago, I happened to see him again after that first meeting and a memory of him flashed in my mind like a lightning. Since then, I could not remove him from my mind.

His name is Alex Hong. Remember him? In Love Story in Harvard. I really love that series that I watched it entirely before it was shown on Philippine Television. Aside from the story (which I wanna relate myself into), I am so much into Kim Rae Won that time that’s why I finished watching it and I even planned of repeating it all over again (but I think I’m lacking time now). Presently, it’s Lee Jung Jin who steals my heart. So, consider Kim Rae Won as my ex. Ha ha!

Somebody just asked me how my lovelife is going on. I told her about Lee Jung Jin and she called me “nuts”! Fine. Nuts kung nuts. A good friend told me that only a courageous man can wall off that barrier surrounding me. I don’t know, sometimes I wanna experience that kilig of your own story, not by others. I think they're different. But when an individual knocks, I slam the door shut and conclude to myself that I am not ready for anything. I am hurting people, I know. I am hurting also, so that’s fair enough. Hehe. I am hurting because I hurt them. They’re hurt because I never give them the chance to break into that wall that envelopes all that kilig emotions in me.

God, let my Alex Hong-slash-Lee Jung Jin come.

meet Outlandish

“We live in times when political positions are becoming polarized and cultures are considered fenced-in entities that cannot be united. The world is often viewed through a faulty prism that divides “us” from “them”. That’s why it such a tension-breaker when someone takes the time and uses their talent to remind us that we are all human beings. That the blood running through your veins is significantly different from the blood that flows through your neighbor’s body, even though you may not share the same social status, political views, religious conviction or hail from the same latitude or longitude.”

This is where Outlandish enters the picture.

Their story is an uplifting tale about three friend’s common adventure, which starts in the youth clubs and soccer fields of the western Copenhagen suburbs. At the same time, it is the story of a band that insists on the vantage point called “the world we live in”, and through subjective, grass-root musical narratives, tries makes a difference. Quite a bit has happened since Lenny Martinez, Waqas Qadri and Isam Bachiri—with, respectively, Cuban, Pakistani and Moroccan backgrounds—broke ground in 1997 to build Outlandish and begin a career together.

With the release of Outland’s Official (2000) Outlandish publicly unveiled a unique mode of thought and approach to creating modern music: a musical, socio-cultural melting pot heated by the hip-hop Lenny, Waqas and Isam had had a passion for since early youth. It was like a special type of fusion cuisine in which the fundamental ingredients were clearly American, but with dashes of spices that might be beats, samples and snatches of Arab pop, Bollywood soundtracks as well as Latin American rhythms. The lyrics were expressed in English, Spanish, Urdu, Arabic—and Danish. Or as Isam later painted a verbal picture: “I was in my room listening to Tupac, my mother was playing Moroccan folk music on the stereo down in the living room, and somewhere along the line the idea popped into my head, that I could unite the elements of my life in music.”

Considering the quantum leaps the band has taken from album to album, it will be interesting to see how their music will leap into various areas of the world. One thing is sure: Outlandish has created its own definition of world music. And no matter how many differences there are in the world, the humble human being will be heartened, entertained and educated by listening to Outlandish.

Choosing Hiatus

“That is why it is so important to let certain things go. To release them. To cut loose…Don’t expect to get anything back, don’t expect the recognition for your efforts, don’t expect your genius to be discovered or your love to be understood…Stop being who you were and become who you are.”

            For three weeks now, she’s scrutinizing her heart as somebody stole it from her chest—crushed it, stepped on it and ripped it on the open. She saw it bleed until no more viscous blood gushed from the poor organ and it went pallor.

            She does not blame that person.

            She’d rather blame herself for being vulnerable, for letting that person snatch the organ that keeps her alive. She could have guarded it.

            She’s still on the process of picking up the fragments of her heart and vascularizing the bruised, contused, and battered organ.

            She does not deny the presence of pain, for pain makes her human. This excruciating experience may be an indicative of growth. Awareness of its presence is at the same time reducing it and gradually letting it go.

            Her world’s may be gloomy these past three weeks, but she’s optimistic that the sun will shine on her again to nurture her heart so it can return to its place and start beating again.

            She presently chooses to dwell into the state of hiatus especially in circumstances that involves the fragile heart. She chooses to preserve her heart.

“In the words of a Persian sage: Love is a disease no one wants to get rid of. Those who catch it never try to get better, and those who suffer do not wish to be cured”

The Lake House

A love story of two people from different periods of time. The man (Keannu Reeves, plays Alex an architect) lives in 2004 while the woman (Sandra Bullock, plays Kate a doctor) lives in 2006, a difference of two years. Their means of contact is through a mailbox by the lake house owned by Alex, which, eventually was rented by Kate. They virtually enjoyed the company of each other though they haven’t met for once in their lives, considering that they live in separate era. I mentioned it is a love story, well, yes, they fell in love. They fell in love to the point that they’re ready to give their whole heart to each other contemplating that the entire scenario is genuine.

 Of course it is a movie, after being moved by it we would end up appreciating the director, the scriptwriters, the actors and actresses for coming up with such a magnificent movie. But did it ever occur to you if this could happen in a real setting? Could this be possible? Can the man from the past communicate with the woman in the present or in the  future? How could that be? Hmmmm.. Physicists out there, this is a new thing for you guys to ponder on.

 Alex and Kate end up together as anticipated. She waited for him to meet her in the present year that she lives, that is, he has to live his life for two years and wait for the time to come. They WAITED for the right time to come, the time when the year wherein they both live will finally meet. Okay, so in the movie they waited. Let me shift back to reality; let’s assume that what happened in the movie could possibly happen. Is it possible to fall in love with someone you haven’t met in your entire life, creating an idea of him only through letters? Will you wait for that person to come into your life and hope that you will live happily ever after? What if you will spend your whole life waiting?

 I never involved myself into a serious boy-girl relationship. Not even once. Not even a chance. I realized how isolated I’ve let myself become. Believe me, you can get a bit desperate. How many times have I asked myself: are you ready, are you ready, are you ready? And how many times did I hear myself yell back: NO, NO, NO YOU”RE NOT!!! And so, I let all my feelings go and see them die. I’m not acting naïve, coy or demure in here, because I am not. I have opened my eyes to the culture that dictates that having a boyfriend is taboo (many disregard this though, but I am a norm-abiding person as you know), Islam says it’s harram, and my heart says that there’s something better coming around the corner. I shall wait then.

 Two-liner from Kate that, again, sounded like my echo:

“Here’s a man who wants to spend the rest of his life with me, but I push him away. In the meantime, the one man I can never meet, him I would like to give my whole heart to.”