Words For The Heart

As I'm waiting for this movie to buffer, I keep myself busy reading between a book and some helpful websites, blogs, news, etc. I happened to loiter at I Got It Covered which is an Islamic site that caters to contemporary muslim women. I have been looking for good religious reads that will boost or open my heart back to my faith. It's not that I completely lose my faith but oftentimes I forget worshiping The Almighty Allah SWT. It somehow feels like I have lost my connection to Him by missing my prayers. Prayers, as we know, is a form of meditation that enables us to talk to Allah, ask for forgiveness and express our heart's desires. I am completely aware also that I can not blame anything or anyone, such as clerkship, for missing my prayers. "If there's a will, there's a way.". What I'm trying to say is that shaytan has got the best of me by skipping one of the essentials of my faith, but He perfectly knows how I try to push the demon out of my way and run towards His path. While reading on some articles on the above-mentioned website, I noticed some quotes lingering on the side. These I wanna share:

"Things aren’t always as they seem. Umm Musa was told to throw her son in the river, Yusuf was left for dead in a well, Maryam delivered a child alone, Yunus was swallowed by a whale, Ibrahim was thrown in the fire and Umm Salamah thought no one could be better than Abu Salamah. Yet look at how it turned out for them… in the end. So don’t worry, Allah has a plan for you."

— AmatuAllah
"The medicine of the heart is five things: reading Qur’an and pondering its meaning; having an empty stomach; praying at night (qiyam al-layl), beseeching Allah at the time of suhoor; and keeping company with righteous people." — Yahya ibn Mu’adh 
"Don’t have a BRING-IT-ON attitude with shaytan; make du’aa to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala to protect you from his tricks."-Muhammad Alshareef

"The wise person is the one who pays attention to his time and does not treat it as a vessel to be filled with cheap things and vain talk. Instead, he limits it to worthy efforts and righteous deeds that please Allah and benefit other people. Every minute of a person’s life carries the potential to raise his own status and to make his people happier, little by little."

— (Islam Q&A)

"The likeness of those who spend for Allah’s sake is as the likeness of a grain of corn, it grows seven ears; every single ear has a hundred grains, and Allah multiplies (increases the reward of) for whom He wills, and Allah is sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All-Knower."

— [Surat al-Baqarah, 2:261]

"What is this world but a dream that a sleeper sees – he delights in it for a few moments, and then wakes up to face reality."

— Hasan al-Basri
All this time that I missed countless prayers (5 times a day!!), I felt nothing but guilt! Guilt that He has blessed me so much and yet I am not doing anything for Him, to show Him how grateful I am that He has created me with complete senses to enjoy my surroundings, senses to be able to judge between right and wrong, that I was born into a pair of wonderful parents and that He surrounded me with intellectual people (my friends!!), and that He has answered most of my prayers. Guilt that I can only remember Him and prostrate whenever I'm in a verge of breaking down, whenever I am depressed, or whenever I am in utter need of His guidance. I am such an ungrateful creature!! You know why my heart clamors for words that can open it up towards The Almighty? Because, my heart has never been at peace than after a prayer. I was never at peace than being on my prayer mat, prostrating in worship to Allah SWT, reading the Qur'an (the English translation), and repeatedly praising Him. He, who grant me all these blessings, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful. I do not know what lies ahead, but with Him at the center of my life, InshaAllah, I have nothing to worry. :)

I met up with my Mom for lunch. Before the food was served, she told me to look after her stuff as she's gonna pray. I asked where, and she said "here". Yes, right there while she's sitting, she bowed for prostration. That's why I admire my Mom. And guess what I felt again? In capital and bold letters, G-U-I-L-T. 

Check it out how at polaroin.com. Thank you very much Ate Dee for sharing!

Patho/Rehab

After Anesth/Derma comes Patho/Rehab Med. Pathology in the morning and Rehab Med in the afternoon. I have seen so many things in the Patho clinic that one wouldn't ordinarily see in the hospital, or some things that we wouldn't normally mind but are clinically significant. "Little things do matter", 'ika nga. And I am so surprised how I am so ignorant of such little things I sometimes want to melt in shame. At the same time, there are countless things that amazed me. 

Back in the OB-GYN module in junior med, I was able to read up on mature ovarian teratomas which are presumably derived from ectodermal differentiation of totipotential cells. Normally, one would find hairs, cheesy sebaceous materials, tooth, bones, and rarely, brain tissues in the ovary. Common beliefs would blame witchcrafts or adultery with evil, but of course, we are in the 21st century where almost everything can be explained by science. When I was an OB-GYN clerk, we rarely have gynecologic cases. Most ovarian cases I was able to assist to in the OR were either serous or mucinous cystadenomas judging from their gross appearances. Only in the patho lab was I able to see dermoid cyst which we were able to identify immediately by the hairs and the sebaceous materials!! There was even a nipple protrusion and a piece of tooth found!! 

Dermoid cyst.

Aaaahh!! There are so many fascinating things in the Patho lab. For instance, when you see your crush's pleural fluid for cytology exam. And you'd be like "what? oh, what could be happening to him?". And there you see, under the power of the microscope that he's positive for Koch's infection aka TB!!! Eeew. He's a health worker so he's prone to that. All of us, Filipinos, have 95% possibility of having a latent tuberculous infection. Just don't get that immune system of yours down.  Whatever, he's still my crush. My tall and lanky crush who made my surgery days a lot more inspiring. Yiheeee.  <3

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In the Rehab clinic, all we do is to observe what is being done to the patients after our lectures. Mostly are post-stroke, s/p ORIF, those with Bell's palsy, scoliosis and other musculoskeletal diseases. Shengot and I roam around like kids trying some of the modalities used.

Sheng trying on the crutches.

Pretending to meditate using the vestibular ball.

We also tried paraffin waxing (i loooovee!!!) and the different electrotherapies. I pray none of my family members and friends would suffer anything that would bring them to the Rehab because I swear you wouldn't like the feeling of electricity permeating through your muscles!! Even with 9 volts only, it shook my muscles like crazy I so hate the feeling!!! Brrr... 

*****

This is another story. 

In line with being a med student, we're taught to investigate like a journalist. We ask who, why, when, where, how. It came to my knowledge that someone we closely know has chronic Hepa B infection, and presently has psoas abscess and his attending cannot completely rule out malignancy. I feel for him and his family. I know they're keeping this a secret because of the Hepa B infection which connotes his true sexual preference. I don't care he's homo, he's still a very good friend and I wouldn't judge him because of that. This time around, he cannot deny, his illness spoke in his behalf.I'm still deciding whether to visit him in the hospital. Most probably, I would. As a friend, I cannot do anything but pray for his early recovery. InshaAllah. Ameen. 

Let's Take A Pause

I can't remember where I read that taking a momentary pause is helpful to give the racing mind a time to breathe and gear up for the next lap of life. So there, after gathering all the pros and cons, I have finally mustered the courage to take a pause by deactivating my FB account. This is not the first time, I did this last year, too, and it lasted for a month. This time, I do not know when I will be back again. Probably, when I miss my enormous FB crush. Eeeeepp. <3

A few moments ago, I received this in my e-mail.

On a serious note, the triggering factor is a friend request by someone really close to me. Ironically, she's very close to me that I want to shut her from that tiny nook of my life called Facebook. I just don't want her to see that side of me, that naughty, non-sense girl that I am. I am pretty sure most of us keep the chronicles of our lives by posting status and photos, and that I don't want her to keep track of. I don't want to hurt her by rejecting the request, so I think the most appropriate thing to do is to totally shut the account. I have the perfect excuse when she asks me about it. That way, I can spare people from wasting their time reading my status or browsing my photos and the other way around. I am not pretending to be celebrity-like, it's just that..... ok, so I'm just trying to sound like a celebrity here. LMAO. Let's see how much of my time I can save by doing this.

*****

Patients poured in at the Satellite Health Center at Brgy. Tambacan today. On my first 30 minutes of enduring the heat at the little hut, few oldies came in for BP monitoring. Later on, mothers came to consult for their children. I doled out some medications: paracetamol, cotrimoxazole and guaifenesin for those who, judging from their attire, cannot buy the said medications no matter how many prescriptionsI write for them. Free meds are like magnet, almost everyone in the neighborhood came for consult and just like in a medical mission, most are faking illnesses just to get free meds. Of course I know how a sick person looks like, no matter how a person conceals, we would know that something is really wrong. So I gave out meds only to those who need 'em. :) 

Meanwhile, our Psychiatrist perceptor wasn't around this afty. Good thing, I have Haruki to accompany me. I was supposed to have a date with Mr. Guyton but I ditched him for Mr. Murakami. :)

*****

This, I guess, is one of the reasons why I deactivated my FB account. Blogging is more fun!!

Siblings.

I was at home this weekend to attend to a very good friend's wedding. Unfortunately, we didn't made it to the ceremony proper so we ended up ambushing the newly weds at the bride's home. Jalal (brother next to me,) drove me to the place and fetch me thereafter. I jokingly asked him to treat me for dinner of which he agreed only because he just got paid for his job as a part-time instructor at AKIC, otherwise, nada. We spent the whole time talking about our other siblings and our parents. My siblings and I grew up together the whole time in a close-knit nuclear family. Back in the day, we do things all together--sleep, eat, pray, take a bath, go to school, watch TV, play, almost everything. We are always together at home that we are so fed up with each other's face so we fought a lot, call each other nasty names--the nastiest we can think of we can even evolve the word into something unheard, weird and real nasty to the ear. For example (I'm sorry sister, this is just an example!), my sister's nickname is Amanee, when I was mad at her, I used to call her Maniok (one who sticks finger to somebody's ass), then our brothers transformed the word into Maniokot, then Siokot, then to Soko!!! You figure out?! Worst thing is, the last one stuck, and we still call her that every time she makes someone fuming mad at her. Our other brothers have also their fair share of pretty nicknames such as: Pogampong, Adampok, Matintir and Marantok whose real nicknames are Jalal, Adan (aka Alex), Mata (aka Zul) and Mara (aka Ahmad), respectively. You might wanna ask for my share of beautiful nickname, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I have none! That's the perk of being the eldest, you bully your younger siblings by calling them names while they don't have the guts to call you one, at least on your face, that is. Probably I have millions behind my back. Well, none that I know or heard of. Harhar.

Nearly four years ago, I started to drift off from my siblings as I went to med school. Whenever I was granted the luxury of time, I got to go home on weekends or at least once a month. All throughout these years, I have missed a lot about my siblings. During my short vacations, I slowly noticed the gradual transformations occurring on them from the obvious disparity in our heights ( I am now the tiniest sibling) to my brothers' football passion. I tend to forget that Jalal is now in law school, the triplets are in college and Ahmad is a struggling high-schooler. I tend to forget that they can think better than I do and had great experiences than I had. I tend to forget that they are no kids anymore. We are no kids anymore. I still can't get over that fact.  We are all now six different people struggling to mold our own future based on our unique individualities. However it saddens me that we don't do things together now. We all have our own different worlds. 

As I was staying at home this morning, I noticed the deafening silence as opposed to the noisy morning that used to woke me up. My sister wasn't home as she's at CDO for her hospital duties as a nursing student. Alex wasn't home either, he slept over at his friend's house after their college's party last night. Ahmad went to school very early. Parents left early as well for some office works (on a Sunday!). Jalal and Zul were at their respective rooms doing their own things while the television entertains me. I was at home but I missed my siblings' presence, I particularly miss the noise I once loathed. It feels as if there's no one to go home for. Sad, eh?

Perhaps, Papa was right. When we were kids and bickering, he tells us: "Someday, you'll be the captain of your own life without a mother, a father, a brother or a sister. We will not be together forever so you might as well cherish these times that we're complete. Now don't waste such precious moments by kicking and making face at each other."

I miss my kid siblings. I have no one to bully around. :p 

Photo courtesy of PostSecret.

The Non-Clerks.

It has been a week since we baptized ourselves as "non-clerks" after starting to rotate in the Ancillary Services. Technically, we are still, of course, clerks except that we don't have to suffer the 24-hour++ duty, writing lengthy history, physical exam and progress notes of patients, doing ward works and that helluva pressure of being a clinical clerk 24/7. Ah, we're past that already and hey, look at us, Group 4 have emerged unscathed!! Wohoo!!

The sad thing though is, we go on duty in pairs which means that for the next two months, I wouldn't be able to see (unless scheduled) the rest of my groupmates (I miss you already, buddy Juey and adorable nightmare Tisoy!). So my partner is the Korean Bug (as she's been fondly called by Dr. Marquez), Sheng aka Shengita/Shenggay/Toy/Pet.

In this rotation, we will report into 8 minor departments: Anesthesiology/Dermatology, Pathology/Rehab Med, Health Centers/Psychiatry, and Ophthalmology/Radiology during clinic hours. That implies how much free time we got on our last two months of clerkship! So below are some photos of Sheng and I in the O.R. as Anesth clerks and our killing-time moments at some nearby coffee shops. 

Since I am blessed with so much spare time, I jot down the productive things I plan to do (ahem, good luck to me! )*shunning away procrastination* :

a. Finishing my backlogs, i.e., discharge summaries, IM census, etcetera. 

b. Reading both medical and non-medical books. As you know, reading time is meager while on duty. And I seriously need to catch up on my internal medicine readings since it is the rotation in which I read/learn the least. I almost read none!!

c. Write more. I have abandoned my journal for quite some time.

d. Watch more movies. Yeah, I'm catching up. I've seen Good Will Hunting (a 1997 film that made me understand why a lot of girls drool over Matt Damon and why a lot of guys wanna be just like him!), Black Swan (a psychological horror film that made Natalie Portman Best Actress in the recent Golden Globe Awards), The Social Network (Mark Zuckerberg, I appreciate your genius but I wish you didn't entertain your idea of creating Facebook!),  Tangled (a feel-good movie that will surely blow your blues away!) and Love and Other Drugs (Anne Hathaway!!). :) And counting!!!

e. Go home frequently. Since we don't have weekend duties, I want to spend more time with my family. Nothing beats the feeling of being at home.

f. Laag/Lakwatsa/Travel! Our group is still deciding where to go. Possibly at Dahilayan in Bukidnon. C'mon Shengita, draft our lakwatsa schedule now! Weeee!!

The point of this entry is to make the rest of our classmates who are "still clerks" jealous!! Haha!

So, I Was The One Who Got Away.

What you are about to read was written last August 14, 2010 on my personal journal (which I unintentionally abandoned for the past two months). I was supposed to write under the title "To The One Who Got Away", but while I was constructing my thoughts, it occurred to me that all this time I was the one who actually got away! So here. 

Hi. It's been a long while. While I'm staring at my lappy monitor, the cursor blinking right at me, you suddenly crossed my mind. Probably because the three of us were together this afternoon so I thought of writing this for you. 

Changes. How it abruptly occurs they don't even send a signal. While the factors affecting it is a blur I cannot pinpoint. Several years ago, the idea of us becoming strangers to each other was unbelievable. We were a circle of tremendous allies who seemed unbreakable, we were sisters! We reckoned we had a colossal foundation to start our friendship with! But look at us now, our coexistence seems negligible. We belong to the same world yet we try to build our own worlds apart creating our own covenants.

Was it really you who got away? Perhaps, I was. I blame myself for having the tendency to escape as a form of precaution. I sensed the impeding doom brought about by the monster I and the others had discovered in you. Such a waste of beauty only to be rotten by greed, envy and lies. But who am I to judge you? I am not perfect either. The difference is I know I am not perfect. Do you?

Admittedly, I was the one who changed between us. I sincerely seek for an apology for dropping off everything we had. It may not be the mature thing to do but I can't stand being all hypocrite like you, acting as if nothing has changed. Call me mean and whatever names you can think of, talk on me behind my back, I don't care. So be it. 

As I'm scanning our photos accumulated for our almost four years of friendship, I can't help but feel nostalgic recollecting our childish conversations, our whining about petty stuff and our dreams. Dreams of going to med school together and of becoming doctors someday. Cliche, but it surely seemed like yesterday, chatting in the vacant classrooms, waiting for our professors to arrive while ranting about our daily lives. 

Just so you know, I miss you. However we must accept that we cannot replay our past and get back into each other's lives just like that. There's already that thick line that divides us. As the pages of our lives turns to another, so as our perceptions, feelings and decisions.

We will part soon, very very soon. I hope you cherish our good memories together as I do. I will try to forget everything that happened. I will try persistently.

I have forgiven you, I pray that deep down in your heart you have forgiven me too. :)

Good luck to both of us as we embark on a new journey. 

Answered Prayer

 Finally, matching is done. There's basically none to fuss about. Just another phase to conquer. :) 

Alhamdulillah. 

Code Blue

"Every noted doctor was inexperienced at first". -Dr. Aizawa

This Japanese medical drama had been a craze among my classmates last year. It's a cross between Grey's Anatomy and House MD minus the former's excessive drama on love, sex and life and the latter's seriously crazy only-in-the-books medical diagnoses. Now that the craze had died down, it's my turn to rise! Hahaha! Yeah, the non-conformist side of me is talking. Anyway, I just started it last night at the quarters while I was on duty out of boredom. BOREDOM?! You heard me right, twelve lang ata admissions namin ni Sheng last night! Benign! Back to Code Blue, it's a story about young doctors on their first year as trainees in Emergency Medicine. What I loved about it is that their cases are the common ones you usually encounter in the ER like orthopedic emergencies, cardiorespiratory arrest, shock and etcetera, plus they're Asians! :) I can't wait for next week, during my Ancillary rotation so I can finish the entire 2 seasons! 

A 2010 Summary

Better late than never! :)

2010 has been a wonderful year full of challenges, new experiences, new environment, new people, yet full of stress, doubts and contemplations for me. Let me a share a few photos that has been memorable. 

Pre-clerkship groupmates. 

We were junior medical students then at the beginning of pre-clerkship. Everyone was so eager to explore the hospitals and be called junior clerks or interns. Little we did know what real clerkship would be like. :) 

My best friend Lily who has just graduated from medical school. In few months time, she'd have her license (to kill, joke!) and be called Dr. Mamari. 

2010 has been a year of friendship as I try, at least once in a while, to re-connect with my friends who are away just to keep the ties even closer. This is a year of meeting new and old friends alike. 

Tampoy and Yas. My future lawyer friends.

 A blurry photo of Nimai and I. My future ambassador new-found friend. 

Dr. Abdul Aziz Ontok. One of the few people I looked up to at med school. Met him again during MSU Foundation Day as we pay tribute to their batch, the pool of new physicians. 

 My housemates and bestfriends for the past two years. We eat together, sleep together, laugh together and somehow cry together. We've seen each other's summit and deepest points. *sigh* I love these girls, Gans and Miss Ayin. 

 Of course, the older sister I never had, but I have. Thank you for the words of wisdom and for everything that you are. My precious, Ate Diane. 

The people I spent my 2010 New Year with, and I know it'd never be the same again! Hey, Adnan and Mabi! :) I love this photo. Haha. 

Bit's homecoming with some of our nurses friends. :)

If I'm going to quantify the time I spent with my family this year, it would amount to less than 5% only. Imagine? I've been only one-hour away from home but clerkship took the precious moments I should be spending with my dearest loved ones. Alhamdulillah, I was able to go home during the Eid'l Fitr and for the first time in so many years, we had a family photo together. Yet, we were incomplete because my brother Alexander was in Singapore for his OJT. He's home now though, a total changed man for the better. 

(at the back from left) Moi, Papa, Mama and Amanee (my soul/sole sister)

(front from left to right) Ahmad, Jalal and Zul. 

Alexander enjoying his six-month stay at Grand Hyatt Hotel, Singapore. Having the best time of his life. Cheers to the new you, brother! I'm so proud of you. I love you!

This has been a year of opportunities for me also. Having qualified as a scholar of the First Gentleman Foundation Inc. for the last year in medical school as well as for the internship, we were granted to have an exclusive visit at the Malacanan Palace together with one of our parents. Another highlight is having our essay published in a book by the said foundation. In return to this is serving to the Doctor To The Barrio Program of the Department of Health, which I am so much looking forward to. 

"Dream, Fighter and Believer."

Father and I at the Palace grounds. 

With the stuff we received from the foundation. Shukran Ya Allah! This happened few days before Father's Day and it was a perfect time also for me and my Dad to enjoy each other's company. I love my Dad so much I don't wanna be a grown up so I can be his little girl forever. :) 

In the midst of clerkship, 5 of us flew to Manila for our internship interview at one of the best hospitals in the Philippines. We were not only happy that we qualified but we were happier we were able to have a quick break and just stay away from toxicity. :D There, we met up with our seniors who are now interns at the said hospital. The photo above is with Miss Ayin, yes, my former housemate who's now an intern.

Now let's go to the highlight of this year. If 2010 can be described in just one word, for me it would be CLERKSHIP. No other. Starting April of this year, we go to the hospital every single day, spending at least 24 hours attending to patients, writing paperworks, making reports and studying cases. EVERY SINGLE DAY. Except during our Community Med rotation. Hence, there's no way you won't get close to your groupmates who are with you during your clerkship ups and downs moments. 

With the Group A, divided into A and B.

GROUP 4 A. My beloved friends. I won't say anything about them here because they deserve a whole new entry. :) 

This is also a Year of the Food as my gastronomic appetite won me over. Hence, my significant weight gain. Aaah, I love delish foods! 

With good company around, who doesn't?

Fontina's chicken pesto.

Fontina's Burritos

Dinner at Doc Vega's. 

Zoey's Strawberry Smoothie.

Mandarin's Tropical Fruit Salad.

Coffee Works. 

Kung clerkship ang pag-uusapan, I got tons of photos I'm having difficulty sorting them out because everything for me was memorable. Indeed, 2010 was a blast! I hope 2011 is explosion of new events, travels (and lotsa travels!!!), new people, and as I wish for everybody, may I also find what I've been searching for. Or, prolly the other way around. Sa maka-gets lang. Ay nah, Group A people, DO NOT REACT.

May we all have another blessed 2011!!

The Proposal

I kept mum about some things that quite affected me lately as manifested by the long slumber of this blog. I only got to share the emotional turmoil I mentioned in a previous entry to a very few people since it is something not worth sharing about. I've been thinking about posting this entry a million times already but it feels like I can't move on if I don't post this. Seriously, it's time wasting. So get ready for an episode of nausea. 

I do not understand why some Meranao parents get in a state of rush about getting their daughters "settled" right after earning a degree for themselves. Among the unfortunate ones, they're forced to tie the knot when they're few meters away from their educational success. For some, they're wedded right after passing their board exams. It's like a curse that when you finish schooling or when you have achieved something for yourself then you're already "open for bidding". You've suddenly ascended to that level where relatives talks about you and before you know it you've been matched to the "most eligible son" of this and that aunt/uncle or however you may call them. Probably because back in the day, only few women among the Meranaos were lucky enough to have an education hence it has become a tradition among us, Meranaos, that females MUST get married after earning a degree to prevent deviating from the norms.

There's also that fear of "spinstership" among parents. Any person who acquired an adequate knowledge learns to think sharply of the situation, weigh things and know his/her value as a person. Hence, the emergence of what they call "choosy" or "picky" women. This picky-ness has been the culprit of many "successful women" who chose to stay single for the rest of their lives. (And my mother has many examples to cite. Damn.) Now to prevent their daughters from the misery of spinstership, they arrange a marriage for them to the most "likeable" guy they could imagine for their (ironically, would-be miserable) daughter. Others follow the tradition in the name of "love and respect for parents", while for some, they try to defy and follow what is dictated by their hearts. 

Marriage is not something that one grabs when opportunity presents it only because you fear ending up as a single lady. Remember, it is a lifelong commitment. It is not like a mere boy-girl relationship that you can easily break when you fell out of love. Marriage is something that you can have your entire soul ready, something that down to your very last cell agrees. It must have a foundation of friendship and love, and it must bring acceptance, joy and happiness and not otherwise. I guess you know it when the right time comes, apparently, they just knew it. 

My mom insisted it is the right time as I turned 25. Marriage is not about age. Never. Being in the medical field, of course I ponder about the declining of the fecundity rate as a woman turns 30 and beyond, but hey, come on, I am only in my sizzling twenty fifth year! There's more fruitful five years yet to come before I start worrying about my reproductive health (and of my lovelife thereof). Marriage is something that is gazillion light years away from my mind. When I get to that point of wanting a lifetime partner for myself, I want to do it for the right reason at the right time with the right person. InshaAllah. :)

Come on people, there's more to life than getting married!!

Case closed, InshaAllah. :)

Cheers for the new year 2011!! Let's start chasing the marrow of this so-called LIFE! Heeeyaahh!! 

The Speech That Raised A Couple of Eyebrows

RESPECT FOR RELIGIOUS DIFFERENCES: A KEY TO PEACE AND PROGRESS

Address by Dr. Asnawil G. Ronsing, Professor of Shari’ah, Mindanao State University, Marawi City.

Delivered at Baccalaureate Services, 46^th Commencement Exercises

Mindanao State University

Marawi City

December 8, 2010

            Audhobillahi minassaitanir rajeem. Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem. Alhamdulillahir Rabbil A’alamin, wassalatu wassalamu ala sayidina Muhammad, wa’ala alihi, wa ashabihi ajmain.

            Thank you Dr. Cosain Derico for the kind introduction; my heartfelt thanks and gratitude to the members of the committee on Baccalaureate Program: Ms. Hamsiya Alilaya, Alim Salic Manggis, Mr. Saripada Pacol, chaired by Dr. Cosain Derico, for your recommendation to invite me as speaker of this sacred Baccalaureate Service. My heartfelt thanks and gratitude also go to the Vice Chancellor for Academic Affairs, Dr. Zenaida Ababa for her endorsement, and to the MSU President, Dr. Macapado Abaton Muslim for his approval in giving me the honor to be the baccalaureate speaker of this sacred and grandeur service.

            Honorable members of the Board of Trustees of the Mindanao State University System; Honorable Dr. Macapado Muslim, President of the  Mindanao State University System; Vice Presidents, Vice Chancellors, Deans, Directors, other officials of the university,  beloved and honored baccalaureates, parents, friends of the university, ladies and gentlemen, assalamu’alaikum warahmatullahi wa barakatuh, and good morning.

            The theme of this 46^th Commencement Exercise is entitled: “MSU Graduates: Global Agent in Sustaining Academic Excellence, Peace and Development”. Consistent with this theme, I prepared a speech entitled: “Respect for Religious Differences: A Key to Peace and Progress”. As a speaker of the young and promising baccalaureates, the hope of our fatherland, I remembered my two friends when we were young like you, 34 years ago, who excellently demonstrated the title of my speech. Allow me to tell the story: these two friends were Christians namely Bertoldo Deloso from Surigao City and Ramonito Sanchez from Ozamis City. When we first met as roommates at room 51 north wing, Indarapatra Hall, they were freshmen and I was a junior. When I was about to graduate, they were sophomores. In the eve of my graduation day in 1978 inside our room, I saw them smiled at each other and then looking at me with smiles that lead to laughing. I asked why. They told me that for the past two years since we become roommates, they never taste pork out of respect to me who do not eat pork. Their names are still fresh in my memory as if it was yesterday despite of the 34 years lapse due to the excellent character exemplifying the respect for religious differences.

            Baccalaureates, remember that baccalaureate service is a religious sermon preceding the commencement exercise to remind you of your relationship with God, the Almighty. The Almighty God is the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful. The Most Beneficent and the Most Merciful to all His creations including mankind. Out of His Mercy and Kindness, He guided mankind from the first man on earth until the last man on earth. He guided mankind to the righteous path in order for mankind to please God for mankind success in this world and in the life hereafter.

            Almighty God endowed man intellect and common sense in order for man to understand the existence and the sovereignty of God. The Holy Qur’an states to the effect: “The creation of the heavens and the earth are signs of (God) for those who understand”. The role of the perfect natural law that governs the nature is also a sign for the existence and power of God for those who reflect. Thus, the Deists believe in the existence of God, the power and sovereignty of God over the nature, without belief in the divine books and the prophets of God. They also exemplified an excellent morality as they also have two eyes, two ears, intelligence and common sense that guide them to distinguish between the two ways: the right and the wrong.

            Almighty God revealed His series of divine books and scriptures to mankind through His series of Prophets, peace be upon them all, as guidance and light (hudan wa nooron) in order to guide and enlighten mankind to the righteous way. Among the revealed divine books are: The Taurah or Torah also known as the Old Testament was revealed to Prophet Moses or Musa alaihi salam; The Injil also known as the Gospel or New Testament was revealed to Prophet Isa the son of Mary or Jesus Christ, alaihi salam; The Zabour also known as Psalms revealed to Prophet Daud or David alaihi salaam; and the Holy Qur’an was revealed to Prophet Muhammad salallahu alaihi wasalaam. Among the Prophets of God were Adam, Noah, Ibrahim, Ismael, Ishac, Ya’cob, Yusoph, Daud and Solaiman, Moses and Haroun, Isa the son of Mary or Jesus Christ and Muhammad, peace be upon them all. The divine books mentioned or divine guidance were exemplified, characterized and explained by the series of Prophets to mankind. They were consistent with each other; the latter revelation confirmed the previous revelations. All the books of God and all the Prophets called mankind to believe in the existence of God and His sovereignty over the creations.

            Almighty God has stated in the holy Qur’an: (Audhobillahi minassaitani rajeem)

            “Ya ayyohannas! Inna khalaqnakom min dhakari wa unta, wa ja alakom so oba wa kabail litaarafu, inna akramakom indhaollahi atkaakom.”

Meaning: “Oh mankind! Verily, I have created you from a single pair of male and female (Adam and Eve) and made you into nations and tribes so that you may understand each other, and the most honored of you in the sight of God are those who feared God.”

In another ayah, Almighty God said: “Wa min ayyatihi halaqa sama wati wal ardh, waktilafu al sinatukom, wa al wanikom, innafi jalika la ahyyati likaomi yatafakarron.”

Meaning:  “And among His signs are the creation of the heavens and the earth, the differences of your tongues (languages) and the differences of your colors (races) are signs for those who understand.”

It is part of God’s natural creation that He created us from a pair of male and female and made us into nations and tribes, with different languages, different races for the purpose of having understanding of one from another. Understanding connotes harmony, peace, cooperation, loving, caring, progress and development. The opposite of understanding is misunderstanding, disharmony, hatred, conflict, war and destruction. God created us not to hate each other but to love one another, not to envy each other but to appreciate each other, not to intrigue each other but to help and cooperate with each other.

It is also a part of Almighty God’s law that He guided mankind according to the revealed divine book or books revealed to a particular nation or nations. For example, the Jews are divinely guided by the divine books, among which are the Torah and Zabour, or the Old Testament and the Psalms revealed and explained by Prophets Moses and David, peace be upon them all. The Christians are divinely guided by the divine books and scriptures among which are the Old and the New Testaments and the Psalms revealed to Moses, Jesus and David; peace be upon them all. The Muslims are divinely guided by the Holy Qur’an revealed to Prophet Muhammad salallahu alaihi wasalaam.

The Holy Qur’an stated to the effect: “To each among you have we prescribed a law and an Open Way. If God had so willed, He would have made you a single people, but (His plan is) to test you in what He hath given you; so strive as in race in all virtues. The goal of you all is to God. It is He that will show you the truth of the matters in which you dispute.”

In another Qur’anic ayah: “Innal lazeena ‘aamanoo wallazeena haadoo was-Saabi’oona, wan-Nasaaraa man ‘aamana billaahi wal yawmil ‘Aakhiri wa ‘amil a saalihan falaa khawfun ‘alayhim wa laa hum yahzanoon” (Holy Qur’an, Surah 5: Verse 69)

Meaning: “Those who believe (in the Qur’an); Those who follow the Jewish (Scripture), and the Sabians and the Christians, any who believe in God and the Last Day, and work righteousness, on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve.”

The foregoing ayah placed the Muslims, the Jewish, the Sabians and the Christians on equal footing in the sight of God, the Almighty. Any of them who believed in God and the Last Day, and work righteousness, on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve.

The principle of equality of man, religious freedom, separation of church and state adhered to by all civil law and common law countries is also consistent with the Islamic principle of religious tolerance: “Lakom diinokom walyadeen”. Meaning: “To you is your religion and to me is my religion”.

All the different world religious denominations, though of different modes of worship, the goal is the same – to worship God. The Christians go to the church to worship God, the Muslims go to the masjeed to worship God, the Jews go to the synagogue to worship God, the Buddhists and the Hindus go to the temple to worship God.

The common teachings of all monotheistic religions, among others are: calling people to worship God, calling people to understand, adjust, and harmonize, to love, care and cooperate towards common peace and progress.

Baccalaureates, a couple of hours from now, you will receive your degree through commencement exercise. You are endowed with sufficient knowledge and reasoning, backed-up by divine guidance: Divine Books and Holy Prophets. Thus, to sustain the global academic excellence, peace and development is in your hands.

To the Christians, be a very good Christian in accordance with The Holy Bible; to the Muslims, be a very good Muslim in accordance with the Holy Qur’an. All of you are among the most honored in the sight of God because you believe in God, you believe in the Life Hereafter, and you do righteous acts. You are the wonderful agents of peace and progress in Mindanao, in the Philippines and all over the world.

Again, congratulations! Wishing you the blessings of Almighty God, the Most Beneficent the Most Merciful.

Wassalamu’alaikom warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.   

A Girl

Because I'm in a huge emotional turmoil, I dug poems I used to read. This one I'd like to share.

A Girl

Ezra Pound

The tree has entered my hands, 

The sap has ascended my arms, 

The tree has grown in my breast- 

Downward, 

The branches grow out of me, like arms. 

Tree you are, 

Moss you are, 

You are violets with wind above them. 

A child - so high - you are, 

And all this is folly to the world.

I'm into something I'm not willing to share to the world yet. Something I've been dreading to happen. Something I'd rather DIE than get into it. Yes, I mean it. Better shoot me right between my eyes than force me into it. And I say that with fuming rage! I'm a little girl. I AM A LITTLE GIRL. Unknown to the world. There's a huge and brighter future awaiting me. InshaAllah. And if I am rushed and forced into this, it means terminating the life that hasn't started for me yet. I only hope the person concerned gets to read this and comprehend what I mean. Please? Please? And I pray to Allah to give me what is best for me. He, the Best Planner and Provider, the Master of the Universe and the Hereafter.